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What Is The Reason: Head Covered While Learning & Touch Print E-mail

What Is The ReasonXII.  If I know the purpose of a Kippah is to know that God is above me then why do i have to wear it when I'm learning or eating? My father zt”l explained it as an expression of Yirat Shamyim – Awe of God, when studying or praying. He felt that it was important that we do one extra thing to express that we are doing something special, such as wearing a jacket or tie.

XIII. Why is there a law about touching girls?

The 175th Mitzvah, or, what I refer to as, Concept, in the Rambam is “Do not make pleasurable physical contact with a forbidden woman. (Mitzvah 188 according to Sefer HaChinuch)

The primary issue is one of boundaries. Men look at women all the time. We think about sex all the time, and as Harry says to Sally, “There is no such thing as a man relating to a woman without sex being on his mind.” (Not an exact quote from “When Harry Met Sally.”) How can we control, not repress, our natural urges?

The Torah directs us to establish clear boundaries in order to control our natural inclinations. The concept of not having pleasurable physical contact with a woman with whom we may not have relations is to protect the relationship by maintaining a certain distance.

I would like to suggest another level: We want every part of our marriage to be special and holy. When we honor the power of touch by saving it only for our most important relationship, every touch of a spouse becomes a Magic Touch. There is one scene in Dr Zhivago where the man and woman touch and the electricity they feel is marked by sparks flying from the train’s wires.

We have a choice whether to suffer, yes, suffer, and control our urges in order to have the Masserati of relationships when we are ready to marry, or whether we want a car right now even if it means that we will be stuck with a clunker!
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